Normalcy + keeping busy + careers

Am I insane or am I insane? It’s 3:20 am and I have to get up at 8:00am for an appointment but I just can’t stop thinking! And I feel compelled to write this thinking down. I hadn't really thought about how this blog was supposed to look and it hasn’t really materialized into something coherent, so I’m mostly writing about what’s on my mind. It’ll probably turn into a mixture of things manifesting from how I’m feeling and the experiences I’m having. So I guess what I'm saying is don’t expect it to make any chronological or organized sense.

This post was partly inspired by a ridiculously long "Wait but Why" blog post about careers (you can read it here) and probably a few BuzzFeed quizzes in which you select different chicken nuggets and it reveals which career is right for you. It was also inspired by the impending doom of only living once and getting sick and then panicking once you realize that you want to do everything.

First of all, feeling more and more normal by the day is awesome. Being more social, having a routine, working on my masters with really great peers, reaching out to past colleagues to talk about teaching, spending time with family and friends, chatting with friends online, and even just scrolling through Pinterest has helped.

Comparing myself now to 6 months ago when I got diagnosed I feel like a different person. It was certainly a darker and scarier time with a lot more awful side effects and things to go through (I could write a whole post just about that!) Over the past 2 months I’ve started to get back to myself. I’ve been doing a lot of cooking and trying to eat lots of (new) vegetables and be healthier now that I’m more able. I even gave mushrooms a try! Next on the list are Brussels sprouts and cabbage. I think this has all made a big difference, plus it’s been really enjoyable and satisfying. I spend hours each week perusing the internet for new recipes and planning out what I’m going to make. All the cooking shows on Netflix, reading more about local and organic products, looking at the Mediterranean diet (how am I the only person to have never heard of this?) and even new Canadian food guide have been sources of inspiration. I’ve also been reading some books, watching Netflix, looking at BuzzFeed gift guides, and even tried knitting! Keeping relatively busy has felt good and it’s actually nice to have the time to develop some new skills. I took a Pottery class with my mom last spring and might do it again at some point.

Another area I have had a lot of time to think about is my career. I believe myself to be a passionate teacher. I have been really motivated by my experience teaching at an international IB school abroad and by working on my masters degree. Be careful if you start talking to me about education because I might not stop. I have developed a lot of opinions and ideas even though I am somewhat of a new teacher. I currently have a lot of thoughts about the public system in NS and am often frustrated by this system. This has prompted me to think a lot about possible career paths. I kind of have a new lease on life...really impacted by the “you only live once” feeling right now and don’t want to waste it. When I first moved back from Morocco to teach here in NS I wasn’t sure to go the public or private school route. I ended up choosing the public system for it’s more competitive compensation, benefits, and stability.

Because I’m not working this year (and won’t be able to for a while) I have had lots of time to think about different career paths. I have broken these down into three categories: practical (and possibly more rewarding?), somewhat practical (still related to education), and fun, dreamy side projects that you could do if you didn’t have to worry about money and could just do whatever you wanted in life.

Practical (the most practical options based on my interests, education, and experience)

- Keep teaching in public school even though it is an incredible amount of work and stress trying to teach the way I believe is best in such a constrictive environment. You constantly feel like you’re fighting against everything. However, it is certainly the least risky. A great, solid job that I love. The kids are awesome.

- Teach in a private school but possibly having to considerably change my lifestyle to survive financially. Not sure how different it would be from public school but would hopefully be different enough. Riskier in terms of job security.

- Open my own school (very dreamy thought and I have unlimited ideas, however, not sure if it would ever be possible due to money and the fact that businesses are very hard). Also quite risky. ***Bonus info on bottom about the kind of school I’d create if you’re interested***

- Homeschool children? Not a lot of thought been put into this but could be a smaller version of opening my own school.

Somewhat Practical (mostly random ideas that I’ve only briefly thought about but interest me)

- Teach high school (would require a lot more schooling on my part but I feel like high school students are capable of so much and it could be exciting to see what they could do)

- Create more programs/courses - after school or during school...possibly focusing on real life skills that I think are often missing from education or leadership and community involvement opportunities for students. Could be about career education, etc. Only problem is, who would sign their kids up for that and what kids would want to?

- Become a professor (someday)

- Be an educational program coordinator of some sort

- Run educational/teacher workshops

- Create an educational TV or YouTube show for kids

Non Practical (dreamy, fun side projects and things that have nothing to do with anything)

- Open a shop, cafe, restaurant, spa, or other fun business

- Be an interior designer

- Have a farm? Doesn’t that wholesome, sweet, simple life just call your name sometimes?

- Event planner or wedding planner

- Marketing

- Make gift baskets (these subscription boxes are certainly all the rage right now and I saw a great one available in the UK that people can send to their friends or loved ones with cancer)

- Photographer

- Write a children’s picture book

- Be one of those people who gets to stay at resorts and hotels and rate them

- Jobs involving travel (preferably on a beach or some other awesome destination)

The good thing about all of this is it’s a lot of fun to think about even if it’s not going to happen. I’m certainly a dreamer so I don’t mind if a lot of these things (basically, all) don’t come to fruition. The frustrating part is wanting to do it all but not having the time. All of these things take much time and commitment to work and get where you need to be in order to be qualified. I just want to be able to dabble in all of these areas.

I would actually love to hear people weigh in on these random thoughts...it’s nice to get outside perspective even though the topic isn’t too serious. I like having discussions about this and some of you might have some great insight!!

Well, it is 4:40am and I’m going to sleep now that I’ve gotten all this out. I’ll leave you with this comic and a brief description/outline of my non existant school for those who care.

Imagine this...

You walk into a warm classroom with wood floors, big windows and lots of different areas to sit or lounge or work. Sunlight streams through the windows highlighting the natural materials, areas, and storage (think wood and calming neutral colours vs. rainbow plastic all around). There is a variety of flexible and comfortable seating. This is not at all the cold, institutionalized environment of public schools with which we are familiar. Children play outside rain or shine, dressing appropriately for the weather. They help with cleaning and preparing food. They have lots of time to play and be active and explore their interests and interact with peers. There are beautiful outdoor areas. They learn math, reading, and writing and have the option to work independently or with peers during these times. They get to choose topics to learn about that they like rather than the teacher imposing a theme or topic all the time. The academics are rigorous yet fun. Assessment is less formal and is about taking each student from where they are to the next level. Lots of sharing and communication with parents. Little to no homework. Project based learning - very different from Bristol board poster projects or PowerPoint projects that only require regurgitation of facts rather than any real thinking or learning or analyzing. The school would focus on 21st century skills (which are transferable for the future) over facts (which can be googled in a matter of seconds). Life skills and career education (gardening, cooking, sewing, building, using tools, nature, sustainability, etc) would be a focus. Mindfulness and growth mindset would be highlighted as well as citizenship and community involvement. Children would develop independence and an understanding of the world. The health curriculum would be about physical and mental health. Relevant field trips. Real world over theory. Empathy and kindness and respect as most important. Developing positive relationships. Creativity and curiosity is valued rather than stifled. Higher level thinking is encouraged and taught. Technology would play a role in the class (a balance - many already spend a lot of time on devices but we can’t deny it’s part in our lives and society. Tech to be used as a tool for purposeful communication, projects, research, connecting with the world, etc. not as busy work). Arts would be more valued (and not cookie cutter crafts that go up on the wall looking the same just because it’s St. Patrick’s Day and shamrocks covered in glitter are cute). Cultural education and understanding. Giving students more leadership opportunities in their areas of expertise. Building confidence and creating low risk situations. Mistakes are celebrated and a part of learning. Learning is life long and would be demonstrated as such (the teachers would be co-learners with the students). Instilling the love of reading by just reading and not tearing everything apart. Real world application in math. Freedom in writing to make it more enjoyable (meaning not having to write about your weekend every Monday morning). Teaching about how to think and learn not what to think and learn.

8am update - My alarm has just gone off. I regret everything.